It was with a passionate reluctance that I agreed to review Apivita's Propoline shampoo and conditioner. Well, I never actually agreed; the wife committed me to the project and, well she's a nice lady. Anyway, I was reluctant because A) I'm lazy and I don't want to work outside of work, and B) I don't really care much about grooming and hygiene products.
Don't get me wrong: I'm committed to the fight against personal dirt and odor, but I'd long ago found products that work satisfactorily for me and I had been comfortable thinking that I'd use them until my tragic nursing home death in 2048. I wasn't looking to upset destiny, or do work for no money. But, I made the commitment, so I grabbed the shampoo and the conditioner and headed out of my comfort zone and into the bathroom.
So there I was in the shower, letting the water soak my hair as I reflected on my past and regretted the present in my imagined future. Thoroughly prepped, I squeezed out one-and-a-half lovin' spoonfuls of
shampoo and worked it into my hair. The first thing I noticed was the smell. I'm used to a more chemical smell with my shampoo. The kind of smell where you picture men in lab coats. The Apivita, on the other hand, was decidedly aromatic. It was honey-esque, but not too sweet. It didn't challenge my notions of masculinity, but expanded them like a handsome man buying me a beer in a hotel bar. Re-reading the label,
it turns out that the shampoo does contain honey, "for its softening and moisturizing properties." As far as the feel of it, it was very viscous—much thicker than my usual shampoo. One might say it too, was
honey-esque—thick like honey, but not sticky (as one would hope). It lathered up quite nicely, in fact.
As I worked it into my hair, my hair began feeling thicker, softer and slicker. It felt like the hair you see in those commercials where the woman shakes her head back-and-forth as if to say, "no, I don't want to go on a date with you", and her hair follows one step behind like a wagging finger. The hair just shimmers! So I shook my head back-and-forth in the shower as if to say "no, you don't have to call the police, I'll leave you alone now." Of course, in the commercials the hair is dry. My hair was sopping wet, so it didn't really move. Oh well. Regardless, it felt good in my hands. After waiting several minutes and rinsing and repeating as instructed, I moved on to the conditioner.
Still naked in the shower, I popped open the conditioner. I'm not really used to this step, as my usual shampoo has the conditioner built in. Personally, I like the efficiency of that. But, again, I had made a commitment to this new world of smells and textures and separate products, so I proceeded to squeeze out a heap. It had the look and consistency of acrylic painting mediums—white, thick and creamy. It took me back to art school, back when I was young. Aside from points for tangential nostalgia, the conditioner was also a pleasure to work into my hair. It broke it up into Koosh ball-like strands, making my hair simultaneously sharp and soft. It smelled of honey as well, but there was another strong odor mixed in. I'm now guessing it was chamomile by the label, though I can't confirm that, as I have no idea what chamomile smells like. Anyway, I once again rinsed and repeated and then rinsed, dried, and stepped out of the shower triumphantly.
As I stated before, my usual shampoo has always been a means to an end. I never thought I'd get more out of the task of cleaning my hair. So it was a pleasant surprise to find Apivita Propoline shampoo and conditioner was able to bring new and pleasurable olfactory and textural experiences to the process. They offered, in short, a novel showering excursion. But yes, it was just an excursion for me. Even if I had the disposable income, I'm not sure that I'd crave the experience enough to spend ten to fifteen times more on my showering budget for it. But if you have no qualms about spending your money on such things, then I can heartily recommend these products. Your hair will look and feel good, no matter where and when they find your corpse.
xoxo Mr Style.
Apoline Shampoo ($20) and Conditioner ($22) is available at The Motley, an e-commerce site committed to bringing high quality and indepently produced products to the modern gentleman.
I love the review.
You should do more..
Kelsi Smith says
I know! He might take some convincing though! xx
nursing home says
It’s good to try new products once in a while. If only to ensure you won’t enter a catatonic state when shampoo manufacturer closes down before your nursing home death in 2048. Yes, you should do more product reviews!